7/27/2005

Sleeping Rosebud

Today I slept on the train and missed my stop and and continued to go for another three. Then there at Segambut I got off as to ride on the opposite line, making my way back. It was this decision made of early morning folly that lead to her.


Rosebud as lips
Tired even before the day started
Swayed by the shake and rattle
Serenaded by the uneven beats

Rosebud as lips
Hope you rest and start anew
My stop is here and so I leave.


Wrote this at the old station, where it is sometimes deserted and lonesome to be in and yet so comfortable and soulful, writing next to a bench here a guy slept, looking at his clothes he is not homeless, yet he doesn't show that he is shameful to be supine and relaxed. Oh how I envy him...

I didn't even saw rosebud's eyes, but i know it was closed, her fingers was blocking her face and no I didn't take any picture. I want to be the only one...

Heh...

Tardiness.

I've been lazy. Very lazy.

***

Thoughts flashing/playing/sneaking in my head lately:

  • What makes Explosion In The Sky sound so good even without lyrics? Emotional input by the listener?, Superior improv?, The band's own advanced introspection, cooperation and understanding on how to impart a coherent but multifaceted whole (style, effect on listener, "story") song?, Am I being a little bit out of my league trying to grasp music theory even though I only listen to them and never played any instrument to my and other people's satisfaction...
  • Wondering whether it is possible for anyone to translate Pynchon's work to Bahasa Malaysia with even the same effect on the reader, because everyone read different and feels different and have different expectation of what a book should be like.
  • The egalitarian Resource Based Economy, where everyone produces for every one the best products and serve everyone the best services without the involvement of money (e.g. The war effort of America in WW2.) thus eliminating middlemen, lawyers and (gasp!) bankers. The difficulties over the model when the poblem arises of who should say what's the best for everyone. The prospect of design by committee is a bit daunting for someone like me that feels that in terms of creativity; the individual is superior than a collection of people that have to each of them different notions of good.
  • Wondering sometimes that I am asexual and then doubting it whenever I see females.
  • Wondering sometimes that I am emotionally retarded and confirming it when people sometimes ignore me when I speak. Do I feel the same as others when I react differently? Or is it just my apathy?Am I paranoid?... Yes.
  • Why is there noise in my PC sound system?
  • My supposed road to financial freedom and dreams of early retirement.
  • Are males threatened by me? Do I give female wet dreams? Why this ego?
  • Does anybody enjoy my presence on earth?